Saturday, September 02, 2006

Battlefield Earth - DVD podBLAST

If it takes a million monkeys a million years to come up with "A Tale of Two Cities", it would take 2 monkeys and a retarded squirrel about 14 hours to come up with the script for Battlefield Earth.

It's the year 3000, and the evil Psychlo John Travolta has just been ordered by "Home Office" to remain on the cesspool Earth indefinitely. Meanwhile, head ManAnimal Barry Pepper has learned how to communicate with the Psychlos as well as teach his caveman buddies how to fly 1,000-year-old Harriers.

Though the film by itself may induce suicide, our commentary will reduce that to mere vomiting, depending on how well you've got your gag reflex under control. So, enjoy that.


Blogger directorscut said...

That was awful beyond belief. I still can not believe how awful that was.

And even though it would still be awful, if it was filmed properly and not by someone with a quarter of an eye it would at least be tolerable!


Travolta, a devoted Scientologist and one of the organization's most vocal supporters, described the book in interviews as "LIKE STAR WARS, ONLY BETTER."



Another interesting article of delusion:


Christian, who did not work on the ``Special Edition,'' says ``we set up our own little mini-ILM'' in Canada for ``Battlefield Earth.'' He called the $50 million project ``the biggest independently financed film ever made,'' but nonetheless it needed to be ``incredibly cost-effective.''

``People who have looked at it here say it looks like $120 million,'' he says. ``So I've used every trick in the book.''


Time to put an end to this comment.

Wipe out.

6:57 PM  
Anonymous MaxTheSilent said...

In a rare moment of true inspiration, Harry Knowles described this as "a sci-fi versin of HOGAN'S HEROES"


10:51 PM  

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